one down....

      For years, I have watched my daughter become a monster. The mother is the last to know, the last to accept. I made excuses for her, I ignored the things she did, I let things go that were horrendous. I watched her tear our family to shreds over and again. I went the whole gamut of emotions, from tears to all shades of rage. Over and again, she did things to me that, had she not been my child, would have been cause, reason enough to expel her from my life permanently.
      In my heart, I saw my baby. In my heart, I kept thinking she still was vulnerable enough to need me. I didn't think she did these things to me purposefully. I lied to myself and made excuses for her. Finally, I accepted she was simply broke that way. Then she made a leap. She went from, where she did horrible things because it was her life and she could do as she pleased, to where, she did horrible destructive things to purposefully screw me. When I finally saw that, we crossed a line.
       I always told her, you can do anything, be anything... who'da thunk wasted pill poppin junky would be her choice?
     And her poor, poor children... the things they have seen. For the sake of strangers who do not know me, we will call my daughter, Super Spawn.
     Super Spawn paints me as the worst degree of mother you could possibly have. I have worn that badge for years as I solved all her problems, gave her money, a place to live, bought her out of her messes, supplied last minute Christmases for her children, and kept them for all the months she was in jail.
     Being called a bad mother by the likes of her, well, it has become a compliment. She has lost her kids to Children and Youth and didnt get them back for months. I kept them half the year for her in 2009 while she was in jail for selling drugs just to watch her pick them right back up, (the drugs) as soon as she was released. Oh, and as soon as she was released, I went back to being a used piece of shit. "Dear Mommy, I owe you! I promise I have changed, my poor babies!" yeah right, just so much drivel.
      Anyhow, she set me up a  few months back. Long story short, she was supposed to pay my fines, borrowed money from my youngest to pay them. Told me she paid them...
      I went the next month to pay the next payment due, only to be met with an arrest warrant, suspended license and the constable on his way to my house to arrest me. She lied. She took the money and did God knows what with it, but it sure wasn't used on my fines.
     We have been at war ever since.
      She got arrested last night.
      Now maybe my family can have some peace.